I was introduced to the world of professional wrestling, WWF (World Wrestling Federation – later) at a very young age by my uncle (shout out to Uncle P!). I was the first grader walking around demonstrating the signature moves of D-Generation X, in particular, Triple H (Hunter Hearst Helmsley). If you have no clue, YouTube it and you’ll see the amazingness that is this mid-90s to early 2000s group. My adoration for the athleticism and performance of these individuals often left my teachers and parents saying – “Why?”
“Hannah why are you pretending to jackknife [XYZ person]?” My answer would always be, “Why not?”
Now that I have two kids and one has discovered his true toddler sass, I hear the phrase “why not?” on loop. Also, as a boy mom, I hear this more often than most – at least I’m assuming mothers and fathers of boys are always walking around looking puzzled because their son(s) has decided to do something crazy.
Along with questioning my children’s (keep in mind they are three and one) need to have an impromptu wrestling match like that of the classic Hulk Hogan vs. Andre the Giant from Wrestlemania III in the middle of the living room (YouTube it), my list of “why” based moments is extensive.
Here are the top ten most recent reasons I’ve had to say “why?” and slowly shake my head in confusion.
- Mom – Why did you aim your penis at your face when you went to the potty?
Three-year-old – Because the pee wanted to go up!
- Mom – Why are you chewing on the baby teether?
Three-year-old – Because the baby teether is for people not babies!
- Mom – Why are you licking the wall?
Three-year-old – Because I needed to mom!
- Mom – *Gives son a new toy* Where are you going?
Three-year-old – To hide it!
Mom – Why?
Three-year-old – Because the worms will get it!!
- Mom – Why did you flip over the play kitchen?
Three-year-old – Because the whale shark was coming, and he wanted popcorn!
- Mom – Why are you rubbing petroleum jelly all over your face?
Three-year-old – Because I can’t breathe! *He thought it was vapor rub*
- Mom – Why is your play grill in your bed?
Three-year-old – My blanket was cold!
- Mom – Why are you standing on the coffee table?
Three-year-old – Because I need to dance!
- Mom – Why are you screaming at the drain?
Three-year-old – The orca won’t stop yelling!
- Mom – Why are you not wearing underwear?
Three-year-old – He needs to breathe!
So, here’s what I know, he watches too much Octonauts (which I secretly love), he’s extremely tactile, and he has a strong understanding of his body. With this said, all I can say is “WHY????”
What is something your kids have done or said that left you at a loss? Let me know in the comments below.
Follow Makings of a Millennial Mama: